No, mental health is neither a joke, nor an excuse.

It is a relief that ‘mental illness’ is no longer a taboo, and in the past couple of years, words like ‘depression’, ‘anxiety’, ‘eating disorders’ and ‘stress’ have been used with more confidence and conviction to express inability to deal with…well, say life. 

Let us start with understanding mental health. Mental health is the psychological well-being defined by appropriate balance in love, work and everything else about life. So, when we say that one is mentally ill, we want to imply that the person is dealing with any of these mental health conditions – depression, anxiety, stress, bi-polar disorder etc. 

Interestingly, my memories of growing up also have some words which I would have heard being hurled at people who were not very bright or accomplished, slovenly or undeserving. ‘Mental’, ‘retard’, ‘dimwit’, and ‘psycho’ are some of those words. Years later, when I started coming across people who struggled with mental issues, I realized how ill-informed we were. I felt sorry.

While celeb revelations (Deepika, Mariah Carey, Janet Jackson) about their issues and their journey towards recovery have given not just hope to those in the same boat, but also the strength to accept, disclose and seek help, depiction of people with mental issues in mainstream cinema (Bradley Cooper in Silver Linings Playbook, Alia Bhatt in Dear Zindagi) has played a crucial role in informing and educating the community to identify those suffering and empathise with them. I know people – friends and family – who are open about their mental condition and have not hesitated to seek medical help. Many of them have been able to cope up very well and shown positive results.

But hey, has that changed everything? Is mental health now a very mature subject and are people educated and informed enough to identify issues and handle them. Sadly, the answer is no. 

I have heard, ‘I think I am suffering from depression. I do not feel like dressing up for parties.’ ‘It must be work stress, otherwise I will never miss my game’. Mental health is not sadness, it is not failure, it is definitely not the lack of interest to engage in leisure. While disorders like depression and anxiety are becoming more easily understood, schizophrenia, personality disorders and psychosis are still poorly understood. Thankfully, the treatment is now more accepted and less marginalised. 

While I have seen bold survivors of this deep, dark condition, I have seen many people who hide behind the possibility of having a mental condition when faced with failures and disappointment of any kind. I have heard about people with low ambition, people who have made mistakes and failed, people who are in terrible social situations often hiding behind stress and depression. I have also read about people faking medical illness to escape circumstances arising out of their misdeeds, or merely exaggerating symptoms for attention sake.

Even on Twitter, you see people announcing their mental illnesses; some to seek support, but many to seek attention. It is very difficult tell them apart, and therefore, it is very important that we reserve our opinion, judgement and definitely our reactions. It is also important for us to know that sadness, physical exhaustion, failure and similar negative experiences cannot be loosely termed as ‘mental illness’ unless examined and verified by qualified professionals. So instead of being carelessly prescriptive, and confidently judgemental, we need to be simply empathetic.

And just like my previous blog, I will leave this with a list of don’t-say things:

•         You don’t have to be depressed
•         You seem to have OCD
•         That person is a real psycho
•         Samosa khaale sab theek ho jayega!